5 Ways You Can Create a Marriage That Last

This weekend was the 250th Anniversary of America.  Last week's podcast (Episode 117) shares what history and marriage both teach us.  Just 2 weeks ago I had my 47th wedding anniversary and I've found that  If we don't learn from our past, we'll keep making the same mistakes over and over.  Do you agree?

Here are 5 ways you can create a marriage that last, with each one looking to clear communication so that you can rid yourselves of the things that will... hold you back from happiness.

1 - Build a strong foundation.  Decide what that means to the two of you.  Give attention to what you expect from one another.  Love, forgiveness, patience, gentleness, honesty, ambition's, achievements, kids, values, faith.  You each came from different families, explore your past.

2 - Talk about what means the most to you, and what you need most from one another in order to feel secure and build your relationship.  Print my marriage guide, "The Chemistry of Lasting Love".  Sit down together and fill it out, find what you need most from one another.  You may be surprised.  This will serve you all your years and keep you on the right foot.

3 - Understand your Differences so that they do not come between you.  I have seen so many older couples literally despising one another.  Irritated by their spouses every word.  This is because we Expect our spouse to think and act just like we do.  That means they constantly need to meet OUR EXPTECTATIONS.  Embrace your differences and lean into one another's strengths.  Need help?  Tap into my online program, it will OPEN your eyes and help you reset how you think about your spouse.  Do this from the privacy of your home.  One person seeking answers will make a difference.

4 - Remember what they are good at.  Why you fell in love with them in the first place.  Focus on those things.  Could it be negative things are getting all the attention?  Give a little praise.  I call these Deposits and Withdraws in your relationship.  Today, pay attention.  How many times do you say thank you, give praise or is it complaints that fill most every day?

5- Invest in your marriage and your family.  There are conversation cards online that can get you talking and sharing.  Find a marriage retreat at your church or in your community.  Learn from the "The Chemistry of Lasting Love" guide, things to do together so that you can practice what's most important to each of you.  What's the value of a happy marriage?  Peace, love, support? 

Where we spend our time and money makes a difference.  Most people spend it on pleasures like going out to eat, extravagant vacations, fancy cars, things that don't last.  How much would it be worth, to understand why your spouse makes decisions the way they do, to understand their response to stress, how you can get along with them? Rediscover who your spouse is.

Connie Durham

The Extraordinary Marriage

Atlanta, GA