Can you hear it? 

Your spouse is screaming at the top of their lungs

in frustration because you owe more this month

than you have money coming in? 

It's happening every month and it's sinking the ship!

Lack of Communication: Talk about everything!  In order to get along with your spouse, you must uncover what you need most from each other and what you expect from each other.  If you have different spending habits, your marriage is a car crash waiting to happen.  Take the TIME to figure it out and more than likely, it's going to take some work.

   Cut the Hard Feelings Now:  Who's going to be the main bread winner and who's going to take care of meals, washing, cleaning, and raising the kids?  Is one job more important than the other?  Will you both contribute to income and household?  Create a Spending Plan and stick to it.  Be fair.

   Talk about your Spending Habits:  Do one of you need the latest and greatest to feel satisfied?  Are one of you the coupon queen (or king) ...

THINK about how you feel when you have done something nice for someone else.  Maybe you cooked a meal for someone coming home from the hospital, helped a sick neighbor with yard work, given money to help a family who lost their home, or watched someone's kids in an emergency.  

Being a person of virtue creates a positive energy deep within your soul, causing you to feel energetic and positively good about yourself.  Feels great right?

We like to be around helpful, honest, encouraging people.

True virtue means,

people are the same at home

as they are in public.

Why do most people treat their family differently than people in public?

How did your family treat one another?  You are most likely doing the same, because that's what you know and have seen.  Some say Virtue is old fashion and out of date, but families who treat each other kindly enjoy being together.

As couples we talk about what's for dinner, how we'll pay our bills, what happened at work today but rarely do we h...

In some families, both parents work for a paycheck, in others, one parent stays home and raises the kids.  Kudos to you. But the truth is sometimes both parents have to work to make ends meet.  Now both parents take turns cooking, cleaning, washing, caring for the kids.  That is... if you want a successful marriage without resentment.

Proverbs 31:28  says, "Her children arise and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praises her." As mothers, we often find ourselves overwhelmed and exhausted, struggling to keep up with our busy lives. I was a stay-at-home mom, but I worked part time.  I found the combination fulfilling.  Besides... who more do I want forming and molding my kid's foundational thoughts and actions.  It was sometimes draining but it was worth it.  

Here are some things I've found helpful as you make your way through the journey.

The Emotional Roller Coaster of Motherhood

Stop and refill your energy. Rediscover what drives you and give yourself some credit. "God m...

As people we each have different formative upbringing, life experiences, and hopes for our future. We enter marriage with thoughts of sweet love and building a future together.  There are ups, there are downs, there are times we wonder if we'll successfully make it to the finish line.  We can, if we choose to.  If we listen to one another and truly care.  We can if we focus on what is right, instead of what we fear is wrong.

Truth is that we get hung up on what bothers us or irritates us about out spouse.

We get focused on that, causing us to be critical and judgmental.  Maybe we don't mean to, but that's what we do.  It's like fighting our inner spirit, we know it's not right, but it just bubbles out anyway.  The only way I know around this is to pray that God will help you see and focus on the good qualities of your spouse.

Take a look at the world.  Negative always gets more attention than positive.  Think about the last time you shared an exciting positive story about someone el...

Ever find yourself thankful that it's Monday because... last week was crazy busy?  When you consider work, weekly must does, kids' school and activities and then add in the extras for the week, it can become overwhelming!  That's what last week was for me.

Last week, everything that I've been working on for 4 months, happened.  We had our first MOM.co meetup at church (I'm the coordinator), A giant women's charity leadership event rolled in, and my daughter ask me to be the PAINT teacher for my granddaughters' 7th birthday party... painting outside in 90-degree heat with 17 little girls.  Did I say this was my 1st time doing this?  Now, I can do many things... when I am just a helper, but I was the leader and planner in all of these events.

Yes, I know, it doesn't sound like so much unless it's you doing it... right?  There was prep time and all the other things in life going on at the same time.  Here's what I learned.

1 - We can do many things, when we focus on one thing at a time...

 First podcast in July... airs 7/16/26.  Pastor Dennis Watson shares his own ups and downs through years of marriage and ways that he has counseled couples through using earned wisdom and Biblical principles. 

It's a quick watch!  Host Connie Durham

If you're enjoying my blog and podcast, consider my online program "ReDISCover Your Spouse".  You won't be disappointed!  

Main topics covered

• The biblical call for husbands to love their wives sacrificially
• Why humility, prayer, and relying on God matter in marriage
• How the dynamic of initiation and response shapes a relationship
• The power of small, intentional acts of love
• Common misunderstandings about gender roles and communication

Key takeaways

• Loving well often requires divine help, not just effort
• Thoughtfulness and consistency build trust and connection
• Marriage works better when both people understand their roles and respond with grace
• Even small gestures can make a spouse feel seen and valued

#TheExtraordinar...

When a beautiful 40 something niece dies of cancer, it's final, it's tragic, followed by such sadness, questioning why does this happen?  One bright light snuffed out by corrosive cancer. She didn't get a choice.

We take life for granted, that there will be a tomorrow.  The truth is, there are detrimental behaviors that erode our relationships, acting like a cancer, but we do have a choice. 

Is it time to let go of the venom of bitterness, hatred, and maybe even fear fed by your past?  What if you have 5 minutes to live, what would be most important to you?  Your money? Your career?

We get stuck in our head, allowing evil voices to squash us and steal our joy.  Keeping attention on all the negative things around us, what we don't like about our spouse, how our kids are driving us nuts and we feel crushed by too many things to take care of.  Bills... work... exhaustion

Why do I share this today?

My husband and I were just talking yesterday about what our parent's taught us.  Anythi...

It's Americas 250th Anniversary as a nation.  On July 2nd... (20226) you will find the full podcast that shares the story on how building a firm foundation in your marriage will propel you toward a long, lasting, and loving marriage.

https://www.theextraordinarymarriage.com/podcasts/the-extraordinary-marriage-faith-family-fortified  

Enjoy the short blog above for today.

Find "The Extraordinary Marriage" podcast on Apple, Spotify, and YouTube.

Connie Durham

www.theextraordinarymarriage.com 

Find the ReDISCover Your Spouse online course and begin to uncover and resolve the challenges in your marriage.

Atlanta Suburbs 

Hello Friend,

Even I'm amazed that Jeff and I have been married for 47 years!  I don't feel old enough for that to be true!  I thought all marriages were made in Heaven... but at this age I've realize that's not always true.

What makes a marriage not only last, but fall into the outstanding category? 

I'd say...

God 1st  -  Family 2nd  -   Career 3rd

• Finding things, you have in common, and doing them together
• Be self-aware, know your own kinks 
• Strive daily to have self-discipline, high standards, thoughtfulness
• Understand your different personalities... early on & letting some things slide (I didn't know this concept until 20 years ago)
• Put one another 1st... that's above your parents and your kids
• Talk about everything and meet in the middle
• Keep that LOVING FEELING by talking, thinking and being kind, supportive, and uplifting one another.

The book of Galatians 5:22 says...

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,

kindness, goodness, & faithful...

Hello Friend!

I just got back from the most exciting, enlightening, but also hot and tiresome 2-week tour of Italy and Greece with my husband and 50 others.  We are called the Southern Crescent Choir. 

I'm thinking what did I learn about relationships on this trip?

By the way, I am one of the little heads peeking out from behind the front line on the right above.  I'm just 5 feet, and in the second line... I had trouble seeing the music director the whole time.  Why are several of us shorties behind a tall girl... put on the front?  Who knows!  This is life, lots of things happen that we don't understand.  What do we do? 

Shrug it off and keep on going!

Keeping a thankful and positive attitude can be hard when days are long. Cathedrals are absolutely beautiful but can be so hot, you feel like you may pass out before your hour concert is done.  I wondered if people could see the sweat rolling down our faces? 

My favorite times on the trip were impromptu singing at an anci...