Hostel or Loving Conversations in Marriage (11)

Heading out in the kayak again, today I'm claiming better balance, because yesterday as I was preparing to put my second leg into the boat... I felt myself loosing balance... and OH NO... over into the water I toppled, splash!  It's October, it was still warm, but I'm WET!  Whatever!  Jeff and I begin Laughing uncontrollably.  I am always good for a laugh... silly stuff happens and either you laugh, cry, or get mad.  

Which one are you apt to do?  How about your spouse?

Your personality predicts how you respond to any situation. 

I remember years ago a friend and I were 3 hours late coming in from a shopping trip. We were on vacation together with our families, we lost track of time and even though the guys were worried, (There were ambulance sirens and this was before cell phones) my husband was just thankful, slightly bothered, but my friends husband was mad.  The guys had prepared spaghetti, and as we sat down to eat and we talked about it, the madder he became and the more I giggled, OH That Was Not Good.  My giggles were my stress response to his anger of which just made him madder.  Justifiably I believe.

Yes... we all have different personality triggers and responses.  They sometimes seem odd to the other person.  Mine was not on purpose, I know it looked disrespectful, but this response was natural for me.  I remember when my husband and I first got married and he got bugged with me, I did the same thing.  Difference is he loved me so... he'd get mad at first and then begin to laugh with me.  I know, it sounds weird, but it's true.

Understanding how you and your spouse each respond to stress is important to know because once you're aware of it, it won't sting quite so much!

Learning to communicate in the way your spouse needs you to communicate, will ease the frustration and irritation.

Learn more about how you express stress and respond to stress HERE.

It will change and improve the way you and your spouse communicate with each other, respond to one another, and appreciate each other.

Connie Durham

The Extraordinary Marriage

BLOG 11 of 20 this month finding solutions to marital challenges.