Out With the Trash, in with the New!

Reaching into my nightstand drawer, and fumbling through the junk for the TV control, I'm reminded that it's back to work. (After Christmas) Time to regain focus on what I want to accomplish this year.  There's nothing worse than wandering in the wilderness, listlessly, without purpose or direction.

As I go down the stairs for the first time this morning, which direction will I head?  What's the most important thing I'll do today?  Have I planned it?  Do I have a list?  What's first?  

As I prepare for a successful new beginning this year, I see overfilled drawers, closets, and clutter from the past year that cloud my mind with things I need to do and guilt for lack of action this past year. It's important that I let go of one thing, in order to do, what's most important to me.

What do you need to let go of this year, in order to enhance your marriage and family?  I like to say... Happy Couples = Happier Kids, because a healthy family life begins with a healthy, respectful, loving marriage.

So... How can you make this year better?

By being attentive and demonstrating what you want to see.  Throw out the things that irritate you and count your blessings.  Focus on seeing and appreciating the good things about your spouse. Develop some new habits.  Create Vision and write down a Vision statement of what your marriage will be like this year.

Write down 3 behaviors you'd like NOT to see... and reverse those words, creating what you WANT to see.  Maybe like this.

OLD - I'm sick and tired of my husband's temper, disrespect, lack of appreciation.  I don't care if he stays at work.  It would be easier on me.

NEW - I greet my husband with a kiss and welcome him home. We love talking about our day, encouraging each other and planning together.  (Repeat this every morning, no matter what)

You see, it's time to throw out the trash, the behaviors, reactions, expectations you have for your spouse and embrace who they are.  Be thankful for their good attributes.  Yes, they have them, it's just that the negative may be overshadowing the positive.

I help you shift from a Ho-hum or Strained marriage to better communication, mutual respect, more trust and romance.

Connie Durham

Relationship Coach, Atlanta, GA

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