I was just sitting on my back deck and because we've had a few warm days, I can hear a variety of crocking frogs, deep voices, high voices, loud voices. They're looking for who... is speaking their love language!

You know, as people, we like to be talked to a certain way. Maybe it's straight forward. Maybe it's more important to be thoughtful and kind, but however it is, that we communicate, we expect the same from our spouse. If we're both blunt, we're good. But if you're blunt and it hurts your spouse’s feelings then you need to know it and change it.

I have several friends who are straight forward... AKA blunt. I know I can be the same with them. Normally that's not my style. I'm always strategic when I have to tell someone something I know they don't want to hear. I detest conflict.

People who get loud, blunt, and don't care if you like what they're saying are a part of the group of D personalities that are leaders, principles, and business owners. These people will speak up ...

My husband and I are able to laugh at many a situation! 

We've kept that romantic love rolling along through the years by having fun together, letting go of the small irritations, encouraging one another and simply treating each other in such a way that... WE LIKE EACH OTHER!

No, we are not just alike.  We don't have to be.  In fact, the things that make us unique are what keeps us on the up and up.  We were just talking yesterday about how he's a walking encyclopedia, I know... you may not recognize that... let's say.... he's my google.  An Encyclopedia is a book that contained every bit of info about people, politics, history... and such... so that you could LOOK UP what you needed for your school report as a kid.

The are 4 basic personality styles and my husband and I have different combinations of those four styles.  They are called D-I-S-C... each of the letters stands for a particular personality style.

Neither of us has very much of the D - This style is very straight fo...

This is #9 of the 10 Needs Every Person had in a relationship.  Find the top 5 of your spouse and you will increase your Romantic Love.  Get the Assessment.  Https://www.theextraordinarymarriage.com/5NEEDS and LISTEN to The Extraordinary Marriage Podcast #69 - #73 to find all 10. 

Way too often we find ourselves being pushed and pulled through the day. We open our eyes not knowing where the day will take us. Breakfast for the kids, hunting for the lunch box, where are my keys, one of the kids is missing a shoe. Exhausting and the day is off to terrible start.

Now we’re in defense mode the rest of the day, unprepared, behind the eight ball, ready to jump on the next person who ask us for anything. You bite your spouse’s head off and they wonder why??

This is how you get caught in the “Crazy Cycle”. You bite, he bites, and you’re on your way. How did this happen?

In the picture, my husband and I were enjoying a day at Disney, when it began to pour down rain. We were soaked. If you know me… you know I have puffy curly hair…yes that’s how wet, we were. But we have learned not to sweat the small stuff. When we find ourselves disagreeing, we ask, how much does this really matter??!! Most of the time it doesn’t.

 
On this rainy day… we took lemons and made lemo...

Welcome to The Extraordinary Marriage Blog.  Had to share Amy & Hobie Porterfield's story with you because... it addresses some of the real-life challenges in marriage and the IMPORTANCE of reach out for help.  I have taken Amy's online courses and learned so much from her podcast for my business.  She is a First Class Gal!!  Even ONE breakthrough session with a relationship coach can steer you in the right direction as it brings light to the root causes of frustration and division. 

Did you relate to this couple?

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Coach Connie Durham,

The Relationship Transformer 

The Extraordinary Marriage Podcast 

Engaged, Newlywed, Married 20 years, It's time to understand this and put this to work for you.  #Lovebank #timetogether "The Chemistry of Lasting Love"

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This is a short... from a 5 part series

*The need to be understood. www.theextraordinarymarriage.com/5NEEDS A lot of marital problems begin with emulating our own parents. That's where we learn to let go and move on or end up in unforgiveness jail. Natural human behavior styles and what was modeled for us have a lot to do with our choices. Connie Durham's the Host of The Extraordinary Marriage Podcast... on Apple and Spotify... We explore ways we can be a better spouse as we grab hold of what makes our spouse, who they are. www.theextraordinarymarriage.com/podcast