Valentines was just a few days ago and even though I KNOW my husband and I are simply wired differently… I still get frustrated! I think of myself as logical and intuitive… this coupled with simple common sense says, pay attention and remember what I like and don’t like. That’s what I do for you. Anyone agree?

But his wiring is Servanthood, also called the S Style and he not only wants to please me, but everyone else in his path. As we all know, you cannot please all the people all the time. So, I’m going to say he’s simply spread thin, and can’t remember what I like or what’s most important to me. Did I say, we’ve been married over 40 years, with grown kids and grandkids, and my expertise is in understanding how different personality styles mesh? Sorry guys but is this just a man thing?

Everybody's born with a specific personality style (DISC) and add to that your childhood and the expectations of your parents, and you get the perception you have in the world around you today.

Y...

Know your personality styles, apply the knowledge and get along better with your spouse. What you don't know may be causing division!

Learn the styles at www.theextraordinarymarriage.com/rediscover  and Listen to The Extraordinary Marriage Podcast on YouTube, Apple & Spotify

Watch the full episode: Decoding your Spouse Connie Durham Relationship Coach or Subscribe on Apple & Spotify.

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My husband and I are able to laugh at many a situation! 

We've kept that romantic love rolling along through the years by having fun together, letting go of the small irritations, encouraging one another and simply treating each other in such a way that... WE LIKE EACH OTHER!

No, we are not just alike.  We don't have to be.  In fact, the things that make us unique are what keeps us on the up and up.  We were just talking yesterday about how he's a walking encyclopedia, I know... you may not recognize that... let's say.... he's my google.  An Encyclopedia is a book that contained every bit of info about people, politics, history... and such... so that you could LOOK UP what you needed for your school report as a kid.

The are 4 basic personality styles and my husband and I have different combinations of those four styles.  They are called D-I-S-C... each of the letters stands for a particular personality style.

Neither of us has very much of the D - This style is very straight fo...

Way too often we find ourselves being pushed and pulled through the day. We open our eyes not knowing where the day will take us. Breakfast for the kids, hunting for the lunch box, where are my keys, one of the kids is missing a shoe. Exhausting and the day is off to terrible start.

Now we’re in defense mode the rest of the day, unprepared, behind the eight ball, ready to jump on the next person who ask us for anything. You bite your spouse’s head off and they wonder why??

This is how you get caught in the “Crazy Cycle”. You bite, he bites, and you’re on your way. How did this happen?

In the picture, my husband and I were enjoying a day at Disney, when it began to pour down rain. We were soaked. If you know me… you know I have puffy curly hair…yes that’s how wet, we were. But we have learned not to sweat the small stuff. When we find ourselves disagreeing, we ask, how much does this really matter??!! Most of the time it doesn’t.

 
On this rainy day… we took lemons and made lemo...

Welcome to The Extraordinary Marriage Blog.  Had to share Amy & Hobie Porterfield's story with you because... it addresses some of the real-life challenges in marriage and the IMPORTANCE of reach out for help.  I have taken Amy's online courses and learned so much from her podcast for my business.  She is a First Class Gal!!  Even ONE breakthrough session with a relationship coach can steer you in the right direction as it brings light to the root causes of frustration and division. 

Did you relate to this couple?

Join me for A Private Breakthrough Session and shed light on ways to renew the connection into your marriage.

Coach Connie Durham,

The Relationship Transformer 

The Extraordinary Marriage Podcast 

Red, White & Blue 1976

I remember that last day of 9th grade at Buena Part High school in California. My dad's work, JC Penny's was moving us to Georgia. There were lots of tears, I missed the bus, and I thought I would die. My family spent 6 weeks in a motel room, before we found a home in Georgia, and I didn’t know a single person. We made the best of it, swimming as much as we could in the hotel pool.

The new school year soon came and still I knew not one person. It was scary, but as I got off the school bus, a girl with a funny accent began to enthusiastically chatter, “I’m new, are you new, my name’s Debbie”. Debbie was from Jersey, and her chatter gave me comfort, I had a new friend, and we met for lunch. Maybe I would make it in this new place.

At my old school I was involved in a Modern Dance Group of 50 girls. In Georgia, I joined the chorus, where I quickly became involved with a whole new set of friends and activities of which I quickly began to enjoy.

The next year, I m...