You're not going to adore and desire your spouse every moment of every day.  Sometimes you're going to butt heads, lose patients, yell, or want to be alone.  It's different for everyone.  But ultimately, if you want to stay married, you need to figure out how you can find that lasting love, that keeps you attracted to one another.

We just came back from camping with friends.  They too have been married over 40 years.  You might think we're old... but we still feel young, hopeful and adventurous.  We remember raising our kids, up early, non-stop, dropping into bed at night.  Our husbands worked full time and we wives worked part time, raised our kids, and took care of the home front.  We often got together for dinners, were involved in church, family get togethers, PTA, dance classes, and sports. 

I now watch my kids with their families and remember the exhaustion and how I never thought about how or if we would have a happy long-lasting marriage.  I just expected we would.

 Now I ha...

Have you ever heard “Your Actions are Speaking Louder than Your Words”?  Often, we say our spouse is #1, but where we spend our time says another. 

Ask yourself, in what ways do I spend time with my spouse?  Do we enjoy in-depth conversations, daily activities that we accomplish together, personal growth or new adventures together?  It is said that couples need 15 hours a week together in order to continue growing together as a couple.  Of course, there are times that this gets out a Wack, but typically is this true for you?

I myself have just come from a hard stop, relinquishing my daily routine of Social Media, Recording on YouTube, Writing new podcast, Editing, Creating the Art work, getting sucked into more and more ways to stay on my laptop with 45 windows open, hopping from here to there causing me to feel exhausted, idealess, and too tired to welcome my spouse home, cook something great for dinner, and plan our evening together.

 I’ve loved creating “The Extraordinary Marriag...

Jeff and I celebrated our 46th wedding anniversary this past Saturday Night at an extra cool restaurant called the Old Mill.  It was buzzing with people coming and going, happy people, friendly people, looking forward to their own special time.  Today is actually our anniversary but sometimes you have to move your special day to another, in order fit it in.  Today, I put on a gray T- Shirt and headed to the church to help out with Bible School.

I was thinking about all the kids that came, some from our church, others that had never been there.  Some knew all about the Bible, some followed directions really well, while there were others, that you quickly remembered their names... because you had to call their name so many times, you know, they had a bit of trouble doing what was asked, but it's ok, some need a little more attention than others.

In Imagination Station the kids learned that when you rub a needle about 80 times on a magnet, IT, becomes a magnet.  Then we put the needle o...

Common Stages of Marriage

By Connie Durham, The Extraordinary Marriage

   What is it they say… Hindsight is 20/20.  Well, that’s what you have when you’ve been married 46 years, my 46th anniversary will be June 23^rd.  As I look back, I can tell you Marriage is not a destination, but a journey.

   Way too often, more attention is given to wedding plans and the honeymoon, than to talking and planning your life together.  I know we didn’t talk much about that before we were married.  It was a time of passion, optimism, and planning where to live, figuring out budgets and who would do what in running the household, bank account, and we hadn’t even talked about kids.

   We were running on we what expected for the future.  A well-functioning family life and we were lucky, we got it!  Our families were both similar, Christian, hardworking, well mannered, nurturing, and cared about others.  Neither of us bucked the system… the family system of doing what your parents told you to do.  (P...

I had much rather talk of positive, uplifting marriage topics, but sometimes that's not your story, right? My beautiful guest for episode 88 of "The Extraordinary Marriage" podcast shares her real story... and ongoing real story where she fights to keep her marriage and move past infidelity and it's many hurts.  I often put out short YouTube clips... but somehow, that just doesn't seem right this week.  So... here's a short blog on the power for forgiveness.

Connie

In the journey of love and companionship, every couple encounters moments of misunderstanding, hurt, and disappointment.

These moments, while challenging, offer an opportunity for growth and deeper connection. At the heart of this transformative process lies the powerful act of forgiveness.

Understanding Forgiveness

Forgiveness is often misunderstood as condoning or excusing hurtful behavior. However, true forgiveness is about releasing the burden of resentment and anger. As one insightful quote from our recent Project ...

In today’s fast-paced world, maintaining a healthy and lasting relationship can be challenging.

However, understanding the dynamics of communication and embracing differences can pave the way for a harmonious and fulfilling partnership.

Here are some insights and strategies to help you and your partner thrive.

Understanding differences is crucial in any relationship.

Every couple comes from different backgrounds, which shape their perspectives and expectations. Recognizing these cultural and environmental influences can help you appreciate your partner's unique viewpoint. Additionally, acknowledging that each partner has distinct personality traits can enhance your understanding of their reactions and motivations, allowing you to support one another better.

Effective communication is at the heart of a thriving relationship.

Good communication involves both listening and expressing thoughts clearly. It's essential to listen to your partner and share your feelings openly,...

Most of us express ourselves in a kind, thoughtful way in public... Why not do that at home.  Families that treat one another as special... endure.  www.theextraordinarymarriage.com/5NEEDS   

Enhancing Family Dynamics: Communication, Positivity, and Understanding

In today's fast-paced world, maintaining a harmonious family environment can be challenging. However, focusing on effective communication, positive reinforcement, and understanding individual differences can significantly enhance family dynamics. Hi, I'm Connie Durham Host of The Extraordinary Marriage Podcast where you'll find ways to enhance and grow your relationship with your spouse.  The Effort Will Be Worth it!

Understanding Communication Styles

• Different Communication Needs: Recognize that everyone communicates differently. Some family members may be more direct, while others are indirect. Understanding these differences is crucial for effective communication.

• Listening vs. Talking: Balance is key. Encourage family members who talk a lot to listen more, and those who are quiet to express themselves.

The Power of Positivity

• Positive Reinforcement: Shift from negative to positive statemen

  ...